Wednesday, 16 May 2018

The Reason I am Single But Happy - Part Fifteen


When Desire came home, he brought me everything that could leave a woman speechless. Jewelries, cloths, bags with price tags in dollars, shoes etc...

Very early in the morning after our morning prayer, he will go to the parking and scrub my car sparkling white. After breakfast, he drove me to work. At lunch time, he was present to pick me for lunch. After work, he will be there to drive me home.

On Sundays we went to church with the twins, and oh Good God, that was my dream come true. He refused to mention anything about Laurette or what his other siblings told him Laurette cautioned me about.

He was like 'Ma les gens aura honte' - 'Mum people will be ashamed. I will close their mouths. Just believe in the love we share. I am blessed to have you. Because of you I get to meet and talk with my family regularly. Because of you my kids have a great future. Because of you my father was buried as a king. Henriette, how can I say thank you for everything. When I look up to God in gratitude for the gift of you in my life, my eyes are filled with tears, and even though I cannot say what is in my heart, God reads my mind. Mum, your days of sorrows have come to earth. As for haters, they will be ashamed'. 

Desire does not talk much. He is  the action type, but every word that came out of his mouth melted my heart. It was too good to be true. My entire family was already falling under the charms of his calm nature, simplicity affection towards me that he displayed where and when necessary and his extreme generosity. 

He was too good to be true. I told myself at last, God has wiped away my tears. He worshiped the ground I worked on. We fixed breakfast together, cooked lunch together. One thing that knocked me off my senses when we were in the kitchen was the way tears came out from his eyes as he struggled to slice onion for me. Each time I try to wipe off his tears, he will tell me he was slicing the onions with so much love and passion for me that he could not express in words, and he transforms them into tears as he smiled while slicing the onion.

That guy was a rare specie of ordinary men. I thought Ekwe was a god of love, but Desire was Ekwe's master hands down. 

If we happen to fight, and he saw that I was not holding myself, he will pick his shirt and walk out of the gate. After some few minutes, he will send me a message asking if I was ok, and if I did not miss him, because he was missing me as though we were worlds apart. 

His message will automatically put ice in my hot heart, and I will   reply his text I missed you too. Then I will ask in the message; 'Do you want me to charter a plane to come and take you were you are?' and send.  At times he will even go into the next room, and I will feel he has walked out of the house, and before I finish reading his message he will be standing right in front of me with a big smile on his face and an open arm to wrap me inside. 

That was the Romeo and Juliette life I led with Desire.

In September 2009, he brought up a project. He said he was tired of flying after every two to three months to come and see me. He said we should do container business, where he will only be travelling  abroad to buy, while we build our lives together in the same place. It was a brilliant idea.  He brought this idea during one of our dinner dates out of the house.

We we renewing or love vows at every given time, and the flame was just like the first day.  We had that look into each other's eyes, that told what our hearts felt for each other We had a sense of complicity, that we used our eyes or face to express what we want and we both understood each other perfectly well.

He told me the money he had was not going to be enough, and that I should loan money from anywhere, which he would refund  back within one month. It was not 10 million F CFA, nor 20, nor, nor,  nor.. But the unimaginable.

Well,  I had trusted him more than I trusted myself. I knew he had always wanted the best for us, and there was no reason to think twice before accepting his business plan. It was just the right thing both of us needed to do, to curb down the cost of flight tickets he paid, and build our home beside each other.

He knew  I could raise the money, which I did in no time. Within two weeks, I had borrowed 10s of millions F CFA from some individuals who knew I was of good morals. No one demanded any guarantee. I gave them cheques, but the loan was to go with a 10% interest. So you can imagine that if someone loans you 10 million F CFA how much interest you will need to pay back, or 5 millions etc...

I was not able to raise the total amount, so I went to my banker, who gave a loan, and I rounded up the money and gave to bae, who took it, travelled and disappeared till date.

I gave him the money around the 2nd or 3rd of  October 2009, and he was suppose to start by refunding the interest by month end. 

We kept in touch daily. 'Oh ma, I was at the dockyard trying to finish the loading of the container. October ending past. November, when people started mounting pressure, I sent the pressure over to him through calls and messages, and then he sent me some fake bills of lading. 

While I was tracking a ghost vessel, his lines died down, till date. I tried calling some of his friends I used to call, but they said he travelled to Cambodia or India. Then he never contacted me again.

I was in the middle of the water. I did not want to believe I had been duped. I still hoped and believed that the love he once preached was still in his conscience. I told myself, no man would risk the lives of his two children like that. They were staying with me calling me 'mama' eating from the pot everyone at home ate from.

When I looked at them, I was confident that he could not do that to me for the sake of his children. They had become a part of me. I travelled with them to see my family in Limbe. Took them out as often as I could. Gave them all the love I had left in my chest, and still helped their mother from time to time when she need help.

So their father could not put a sword in my pure heart of love for fear I might harm or take his children hostage for life. That was my thought. I consoled myself in believing that he had fallen into some trouble, and will call me to give me back people's millions.

After the 3rd month, I remembered Laurette. I remembered her words of caution. I had to see her. I ha to make her tell me details. I needed her to repeat again that Desire was a 419.

I prepared her garri and okro which as her favourite, with cow tail. Drove to her photography shop at gare routiere in Bonaberi Douala. She was glad to see me. Ate her food, and then asked for her girl to go and get me Heineken. I told her I wanted but cold water, and she was shocked. They however got me the water, and after she had finished eating, I told her I would like us to discuss something.

We went into my car, and I apologized for not listening to her. I refused to let tears out of my eye, and I refused to let her see how frustrated I was. Laurette is a jovial and open person. She will tell you anything bad without blinking her eyes. She told me that she thought I would never visit her after the last okro she ordered. Though I cooked it for her, I sent my girl Mary to take it to her, and ever since we were just on phone. To greet. I had avoided her as much as possible, because I believed the rest who said she was a spoiler and joy killer.

Then she asked 'I hope he has not proposed any project to you oh?'. I just smiled and she asked again 'Do you even know his real names?' I answered and said Jean Desire Detou'. Laurette laughed until she asked, 'so he is still using that name? That is not his name. His real name is Sylvain(I  won't put all the  names here, because there is a procedure against him, and someone might alert him)'. 

She told me he used their late brother's name since he was travelling and since they both looked alike he had been using that name for God knows how long.

I held back my tears, put up a brave face and a beautiful smile, as she revealed a lot about their family and the reason why they did not see eye to eye before I came and intervened.  She still asked me to go and tell the rest that she has told me more. I did not want her to know that I was already in the water that she cautioned me before and is still cautioning me about. 

Before parting ways she gave me a sisterly hug, and said 'I just pray you are able to change him, because if he loses you, he will NEVER EVER get married'. I left her and almost forgot my car where I parked it in confusion. I heard her called my name as I was trying to stop a taxi to take me home, then I knew I was losing it.

No, I was not going back to the Laquintinie psychiatric. I managed to drive home and only God knows why I did not crush anyone, or had my car bashed.

Back home, I called Marceline the elder sister. As usual she came running, with a list of things that she wanted me to give her money for. I had helped her opened a restaurant, because she was not doing anything. I bought the fridge and freezer she needed for the restaurant and so many other things. That was how I helped even people I had no blood links with.

I asked her if she was part of the plan, and she asked what plan. I asked her the last time the brother called her, and she said she was about to ask me where he was because she tried his lines abroad, and they were switched off. I restrained my myself from speaking rudely to her, as the twins came in to greet their aunt.

She complimented how well I took care of them, how big and beautiful they had grown and asked them to respect me. Poor little things, they came to remind me that their birthday was around the corner, in front of their aunt. I told them I was going to bake a cake buy some drinks and bring to their school so that they could share with their friends. They were very happy gave me a hug of gratitude, and left us.

I thought of asking her again, then stopped, when one of the creditors rang my phone. She said her money was long overdue, no interest nothing. She asked if I was ok. I told her I was.

I was a perfection to many. Many looked up to me as their role model. They knew I was someone smart and intelligent who could not fall prey to 419. My boss was not supposed to know. No one else was supposed to know. When I dropped the call, I told Marceline I was feeling sick and wanted to rest. She asked about the list she brought and said she didn't even have transport. I pulled out  2 000 F CFA note, and gave her, and told her I couldn't help at that time. I watched her as she disappeared from my view disappointedly.

The next day, I booked a flight to Nigeria. No one knew I was going out of the country. I was on my way to the Synagogue withe the engagement ring. I wanted to meet the man of God, to as him why even the prophecy of the ring and photo did not come to pass. Unfortunately I was not able to meet him one on one. I was asked to see one of his apostles, who told me that prophecies manifest to realities even after years. He and one other lady who felt my pains asked me to give them my e-mail and phone contact, that they will transmit it to the man of God and get back to me.

This time around, I was not able to see TB Joshua. I was at the service, praying like never before, hoping the anointing of God will locate me like he usually said. But no, he prophesied to the third person next to me and walked passed me. I thought of screaming out, but I didn't want cameras on me this time, so I came back without seeing, and had to bell the cat.

Back in Cameroon, pressure from creditors increased. We were already in 2010. I started selling the bags, shoes and jewelries he offered me one by one, but could not even make a sale of 300 000 F CFA. 

I became what I had never dreamed of becoming. Dishonest to the highest level. 

I robbed Peter to Pay Paul, but only sank deeper in debts, until I could sink no more. 

I ran back to Laurette. Break the news to her, and she almost died of heart attacked. I had lose weight. Sleepless nights. Calls from creditors, work loads from office, demands from home which I could no longer meet, and yes the rate of depression doubled, but I refuse to go back to Laquintine. 

Dr. Jon was very supportive with his counselling. I blamed him in frustration, for giving me courage that I could fall in love again and be happily married, but I knew the good man had no blames. From time to time, he will recommend bed rest which I really needed, but where was sleep?. Sleep travelled out of me all night. I could not recognize myself/ I was afraid of my own shadow, but the months past, and I died slowly in silence.

I attempted suicide, but even death refused me. I went to the Wouri bridge, after I had written my WILL, and put in the front seat of my car, but God sent an angel in the form of a man, who had been following me with his car, because according to him, the way I was driving, something told him I needed help. 

The moment I was about to jump into the water, he pulled me from behind, and held me tight to his embrace. Other passer-byes stood and watched as I cried that he should allow me to end my miserable life, because I thought my end had arrived.

He finally convinced me and drove me home in his car, before calling his driver and directed him my house to come and go an collect my car parked beside the Wouri bridge.

I confided in him and he cried. That Angel gave me about three million francs to pay some of the creditors as interest, and he personally told them that we would do everything to clear off their debts.

Monsieur Gervais was a God sent. He never asked me out or took advantage of my helplessness like some did as you will read in the coming chapters. He kept telling me it is well. The next time I saw his driver, after calling him so many times and his phones were switched off, I was told he had died in a road accident along the Douala Yaounde highways. RIP 'mon pere' as I usually called him.

Please people, if you want us to continue this story don't sympathize with me.  Sympathizing with me, will only make me break down, whereas I am trying as much as possible to be strong for myself and everyone else who cares about me.

Lesson

Never give a deaf ear to someone cautioning you about something or someone else. It is true that some people caution out of jealousy, but others like Laurette are genuine, though we always doubt people's genuinity.

Listen to words of caution, and try to observe what they caution you on, so that you will be able to judge whether they are right or wrong.

God sends us friends and enemies to give us messages, and if we give deaf ears, then we will all end up on the path of 'HAD I KNOWN'.

Listen, observe and act.


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